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Taking Sexy Back – Alexandra Solomon

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In today’s fraught romantic and sexual landscape, women are taught to view sexiness as a status to be earned, an indicator that society has deemed them conventionally attractive enough and that they’ve successfully walked the razor’s edge between being labeled a “prude” and a “slut.”

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In today’s fraught romantic and sexual landscape, women are taught to view sexiness as a status to be earned, an indicator that society has deemed them conventionally attractive enough and that they’ve successfully walked the razor’s edge between being labeled a “prude” and a “slut.”

But therapists can help clients develop a more evolved kind of sexual self-awareness.

This recording explores how women can move from an “outside-in” to an “inside-out” construction of sexuality, not dependent on how they measure up in the gaze of others, and how men can be enlisted as allies in this process.


  1. Identify several ways in which therapists can help female clients create a more expansive view of their sexual selves.
  2. Examine the ways in which societal sexual standards punish women for their failure to conform for the purposes of psychoeducation.
  3. Point out several conditions that typically accompany a negative self-image to inform the clinician’s choice of treatment interventions.
  4. Illustrate how female clients might enlist the help of male allies in becoming more sex-positive.

Introduction

  • Relational Self-Awareness
  • Me Too
  • Toxic Masculinity
  • Sexual Desire

Declaration vs. Reclamation

  • The Impact of Trauma
  • Reforming Sex-Education
  • Purity Culture
  • Bodily Autonomy

Reconceptualizing Consent

  • Feedback Loop
  • Reframing Male Sexuality as Non-Predatory
  • Sex as an Open-Ended, Ongoing Personal Project
  • The Evolution of Sexual Identity
  • Personal vs. Relational Empowerment

Sexual Self-Awareness Through Different Lenses

  • Culture
  • Spirit
  • Development
  • Mind
  • Body
  • Emotion
  • Relationship

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